The Short Bus Test
Back in the first grade we weren't given exams; instead we were given pink "activity books" that had to be returned to the teacher after we had completed them.
The questions were simple: Multiple choice style. Using our navy pencils we were to indicate the biggest circle in a series of circles; or differentiate between a cat and a dog. Easy shit, really.
Even at such a young age I understood the purpose of this test. It was designed to determine if any retards had slipped through the cracks. Its purpose was to weed out the buds that wouldn't blossom; the bulbs that wouldn't illuminate. The results would decide who would suffer the indigity of riding the short bus to and from school. These children would be forced to become friendly with the kids who had their names written in their underwear...the kids who had their winter mittens fastened together with a length of yarn between their coat's sleeves. They were the brats who would piss themselves during nap time.
Even at that age I was a shit disturber, I suppose. So I went ahead and filled out all the wrong answers.
posted by Wino McHackenpuke @ 4:22 a.m.
11 comments
11 Comments:
I'll bet on the first day of school the bus driver was left wondering which drooling imbecile had stumbled onto the old banana exhaust pipe trick.
*Axel Foley laugh*
Hey, it's Corky from that show! You know the one about the waterhead and his family.
Wino, I can't believe you posted your photo. I thought you wanted to remain anonymous?
-A
so that's wino looks like? nice.
Navy pencils suck, infantry pencils are the way to go.
LOL!
Which feel best between your teeth, Ed?
These pencils, they were simply navy in the way a standard pencil is yellow. The lead is normal.
Finally, I've stumbled onto some class! Very funny. Good stuff.
I use a mechanical pencil now. It has graphite in it. *click click*
I tie my mittens together on a string. What of it?
sarcastrix
It means you're a retard.
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